Has anyone really really compared what you get at a nyc private (55k) vs what you get at an excellent suburban school (eg rye , bronxville). We are not from this area, this is all new to us. We are swept up in the k admissions fever. But really want to hear from someone who has btdt what you think you get at one and not at the other. Figure savings in income tax negate real estate taxes and need a nanny either way both of us work.
Well, first, I don't think Rye and Bronxville schools are comparable (BXV much better school), but that's not your question. Based on what I've seen, the best suburban publics offer a broader range of classes and extras than even the TT schools. However, they have a wider range of students and more "problem" kids. They also have much less diversity. And they have fewer close connections to the top colleges, which is a real plus for the TT.
on that comparison, difference will primarily be in exmissions to college and on the kids' ability to generate a portfolio that allows them to standout. Hard to take classes at Columbia if you're in Rye.
I think the biggest difference is college exmissions (TT will send top 50% to top 20 colleges, even 3T will send 25% to top 20) and network. I went to a suburban NYC school and my DH went to a TT NYC school. My high school network hasn’t really been helpful with anything, but DH seems to know someone from HS who can help with a myriad of things.
This. The alumni network/networking at my TT high school (different city) is invaluable. And private schools do have better admissions to good colleges; there's just a better pipeline there.
+1,000,000. I went to a suburban school in FL, my DH a TT in NYC. I forgot about high school the moment I left (and they forgot about me) but my DH is constantly in contact with his school and friends whether that be for jobs, speaking engagements, etc.
@Anonymous OK, but went to suburban FLORIDA. We're talking about the top NYC burbs. Totally different world.
We sent DC to TT private for two reasons 1) excellent academics and access to what’s not available in public (classes at Columbia, teachers who want to teach, college exmission, ability to stretch in areas that interest DC, etc) and 2) close knit network. DH and I both went to public (him regular suburban school, me bilingual G&T in Europe). I think from financials perspective burbs make sense with 2+ kids (esp if you have both genders and you don’t want them to share a room). If you only have one, it’s a wash between private tuition and city taxes vs RE taxes in the burbs and extra expenses - two cars, house maintenance, etc.
Public can’t compete with private. The students in private are treated very differently than Public school students.
One thing I've noticed is that the top public schools seem to have more impressive performing arts, academic teams and sports. Even the TT privates don't have amazing orchestras, etc.
I can’t speak to orchestra specifically but I know that for some sports, the best kids are on teams outside the school, not necessarily at school.
We sent our DCs to public for ES - #1 switched to private for MS and #2 will switch in 5th. We felt that ES is mostly about socialization and learning the basics (we also believe that parents are fundamental to learning in elementary regardless of school and so made a point to really encourage reading and make new books very accessible). We were also fortunate to have ours in a language immersion program. All that said, we found the class size matters more and more as kids get older. By 5th grade, aptitude and attention spans of kids were too divergent and a class of 25+ was too big for the teacher to manage in a way that sufficiently encouraged learning. We felt that MS would have required that we supplement too much. With what we know now, we are moving #2 to private a year earlier but overall would do the same thing again. It was important to us that our DCs not have an experience of solely having been in private school.
Doesn’t it also depend on whether the public has tracked classes? Aptitudes won’t vary as widely within an accelerated class. Some publics offer multivariable calculus, for example. And class sizes in accelerated classes are also likely to be smaller.
Well, no multivariable calculus in elementary or middle school! There maybe a handful of advanced classes in which class sizes are similar or not too much bigger than private. Overall, though, you really can’t beat the greater resources, whether from reliably small class sizes to college admissions/counseling staff.
My dc went to Stuyvesant from a citywide public that sends a lot of kids to private. The kids from Stuy did much better in college placement vs. the kids that went to TT. Not saying the experience is great at Stuy but a lot of the college placements at TT is based on legacy and $$, so if you are just smart with UMC parents you are already at a disadvantage.
I think it's a mistake to send a kid to private with the expectation of a particular college placement. There are too many unknowns--college admissions may evolve or look different in 12-13 years; you don't know what kind of student your DC will be (no matter how smart or talented they appear at age 4 or 5); you don't know what the competition will look like within your DC's HS class and where you DC will fall relative to his/her peers; and you don't know what your DC will want for college (not all kids are aiming for TT colleges, especially after 13 years of a rigorous and competitive environment--and believe me, they will have their own opinions on the matter). I agree that top privates have more connections with colleges, and universities tend to go deeper into the class when they know that a HS is rigorous. But they can't and don't fill their classes with private school kids. In fact, they might take a student with the same or lower GPA from a less rigorous school because they want to acknowledge that not all kids have access to the best private schools. In other words, you still need to be a strong student to get in, and these schools aren't a cake walk. If you choose private, I think you're better off making the decision on the basis of the type of experience you want for your child and your family. Private school has smaller classes and is a more intimate experience overall both academically and socially.
Op here - thank you for the insight! Great points made! I do keep reminding my dh that you can't expect harvard bc you paid tuition for 13 years. But we hope at the very least it will be an excellent education ... It's just so hard to know if it's the right choice. Right now we have no acceptances so it's still theoretical .. but next month will come fast.
It's true school like styvesant and brooklyn tech are amazing but we just can't know if all our kids will get in. Private from k seems like you're buying peace of mind (at least in nyc).
Do people ever pull their kids and just move to the suburbs ? Or once you're in and committed you can't leave ?
It does seem ridiculous our lives are revolving around a 4yo child right now.
Plenty of people move around or leave private school for a variety of reasons--fit, finances, relocation, move to public, transfer to another private, etc. I'm the poster directly above who said I think it's a mistake to choose private with the expectation of a particular college in mind. My DD is a freshman in college attended private K-12--and I wouldn't change a thing. She is doing really well academically at her college, but she's not at a top 20 school. She had specific criteria in mind, built a list on that basis and had great options, but it wasn't a list of ivies or other colleges that make people swoon. She received a fabulous education at her private school, she worked hard, and she learned to hold her own among a group of very talented and hard-working peers. I think she also learned some humility in the sense that she realized that there were plenty or really smart kids out there, but she also built confidence in the areas where she stood out as particularly talented.