We have a new mom who works as a consultant to our team. She’s very good at her job and very responsive. Over the summer I talked to her about her availability, which was limited because of her first child being born this spring, and we agreed that I‘d pay her a monthly retainer versus hourly so she could afford a nanny. So we’ve been paying her about twice what she was making before, and she’s also been working more, but she often has her baby with her on our calls which is really distracting and getting to be annoying. I asked her what changed and why her nanny wasnt around but she gives various excuses that the nanny is off that day, their apartment is small etc.
I need to give her some feedback and I want to be sensitive given everything that’s going on in the world, but I also know that she expects a year end bonus and I’m frustrated that I feel like she‘s not honoring our agreement to use the monthly income security to hire a full time nanny.
How should I discuss this with her?
I guarantee you she does not have a nanny. I have many women on my team working from home with newborns and saving money in daycare/ nannies. The savings is great but I can’t imagine how they get work done
I just want to add I've heard people who wfm permanently have had to prove they have childcare. Granted covid has changed things but I don't think it's unreasonable to prove to your employer you do have childcare if you are remote. It is really hard to work from home with kids as they become.mobile and many mothers are in denial abt that until it's super distracting (I have 3 small children and occasionally have to wfh,. I have a ft nanny so I know what I'm saying lol)
I would take an easy hand and just say, please don't have the baby with you when we are on calls. You totally get it, you are a Mom too, and (not but) please be mindful. People have been noticing. Then if she comes back with But But But say, Please don't have the baby with you during our calls. Just repeat it calmly, no big deal. But firm. Then move on.
Maybe her dh lost his job and they now need that money for essentials? Lots of things could have happened. But I would just say, Jane, we are so grateful to have you with us. You are such an awesome and valued employee. Your work on X was terrific, and I appreciated how you turned around Y. You've always been so reliable and responsive that I feel lucky to have you on the team. I know it's incredibly difficult to accomplish all that you're doing at home with a small baby, and it makes me all the more grateful for your hard work.
I would like to ask you about childcare coverage. Do you have sufficient coverage? Is everything ok? Because I noticed that you seemed to struggle with A assignment and B pitch, which is not your normal M.O. If your nanny is unable to provide childcare during calls and meetings and other parts of the workday, can you use the childcare retainer to hire a backup caregiver? Can we be more flexible with certain meeting times and deadlines so that we have your full focus? How can we partner on this? Just wanted to get your thoughts on the best way to manage this since we will be in this wfh situation for awhile longer!
so I would still give her the bonus if you want to keep her but I would definitely say something. Not to come down on her but to work with her. And be sure to talk to Legal and HR first. GL.
I don't think you can direct how she spends her money, irrespective of why you gave it. You can, however, ask for certain behavior during meetings to stop. That being said, almost everyone that I know of right now has situations where kids go on the call and we're all understanding about it.
This is a tough year and a tough time not to give a bonus. I think you need to first clarify for yourself what your pay, hours and performance expectations are. Your post suggests that it’s a sliding and I’ll defined scale. It sounds as though her rate of pay has increased faster than her increase in hours - which isn’t intuitive given that the initial pay was also supposed to cover childcare. That said, you can stand on that to make clear that your policy on childcare is unchanged. This should be the focus of your conversation - planning for the future beginning on a date certain in January - and not withholding a bonus because you feel like you prepaid it by letting her pass on childcare.