A very close friend I fell out with is now quite ill. she didn't tell me herself. Do I reach out or assume she doesn't want me to know and just leave her alone? I'm concerned about her.
My suggestion would be to send her an email acknowledging that you heard she is ill and that you're thinking about her and hoping for her recovery (or praying, if you're a praying person). Maybe even acknowledge that you had your differences but that you still value her as a person and want her to be happy and healthy.
If you are sure she doesn't want you to know, then leave it. She is already suffering and you reaching out to her will make her feel more uncomfortable.
You said you "fell out" with her. She is ill and probably doesnt have the emotional or physical energy to deal with pettiness. If she is someone you care about, even if you have had your differences, why not reach out?
This happened to one of my ex friends. I reached out because it was the kind thing to do. She didn’t respond. Actually she put a tidbit in something she wrote that was a subtle dig at me. (Maybe you can see why we fell out.) But that’s not my problem. I tried to do right and mend what was torn so my conscience is clear.
My suggestion would be to send her an email acknowledging that you heard she is ill and that you're thinking about her and hoping for her recovery (or praying, if you're a praying person). Maybe even acknowledge that you had your differences but that you still value her as a person and want her to be happy and healthy.
I am pretty certain she doesn't want me to know she's sick.
You can only play your side of the tennis court. Now you know. It feels right to share with her that you care. That's all.
If you are sure she doesn't want you to know, then leave it. She is already suffering and you reaching out to her will make her feel more uncomfortable.
I'm assuming so because she herself did not tell me.
You said you "fell out" with her. She is ill and probably doesnt have the emotional or physical energy to deal with pettiness. If she is someone you care about, even if you have had your differences, why not reach out?
This happened to one of my ex friends. I reached out because it was the kind thing to do. She didn’t respond. Actually she put a tidbit in something she wrote that was a subtle dig at me. (Maybe you can see why we fell out.) But that’s not my problem. I tried to do right and mend what was torn so my conscience is clear.