As I look towards the future, I wonder if my office gave the option to WFH whether I would make that choice. On the one hand, WFH allows me to cut out child care costs and get things done at home. On the other hand, I really feel that those who chose to go into the office will have long-term career advantages. I predict that overwhelmingly it will be women who opt to WFH because of family concerns, further exasperating the wage gap. But in real dollars and cents, going into the office costs me money in child care, so short-term it won't make sense for us, financially, even if I do get lower salary as a result. I know this isn't an issue yet, but as offices are opening up, I've started to struggle with it.


It's a really good question. I've enjoyed WFH and being w family during this time but a lot of that is bc it's both of us--DH and I and dc--all together. I actually hate WFH and would never choose it, mostly because I want my home back (and miss the professional incarnation of me!).
I guess if we're all in this together and it's equitable, it's one thing. I would not want to be the one stuck at home juggling everything.
And I think you're right that the more "visible" workers will derive a benefit, though I don't think that necessarily means you have to be in the office 40 hrs a week--just at times when it matters,
yes, the other thing you mention is also part of the conversation. I work, in part, because I enjoy it. But when I'm just home in front of a computer all day, I'm missing out on some of what I enjoy about my job (professional interaction, talking to others about our field, etc). I've also thought about a partial work week schedule, but I keep going back to the child care costs: "to go into work next Tuesday will cost us $60-$100" etc.
@Anonymous Well, that's the thing. If you're both in it together then "to go into work next Tuesday" means--"you're not going to work next Tuesday". Or vice versa.
This is true, but I've noticed that whenever anyone proposes this on this kind of board, they get crickets. IMO, there are two reasons for choosing to ignore equality in your/DH's work lives: The first is financial--he makes a lot more money so you agree to do more work at home in order to facilitate the HHI. In this case, you should think of your contributions at home as paid work. You do some of the work so he can get paid for the family.
The other is that you find you can't challenge a man in his own work life. This is much more problematic and deserves a lot more analysis, because you're essentially sacrificing yourself to his career. Maybe that's ok, and maybe that's not--it really depends on a lot of factors in your relationship and your life together.
I think more companies will go entirely WFH or largely remote on an ongoing basis. My small company was initially a traditional setup with two of us working remotely, and it went so well that they decided to go entirely virtual.
even if a company goes entirely WFH, do you think those will become "pink collar" jobs, attracting more women than men, or do you think WFH will attract equally?
My company is split pretty evenly. And actually most of the women don't have children. Honestly, I think the bigger risk with that model is moving more towards freelancers/contractors rather than employees.
I actually agree with this. "Task" oriented rather than salary based.
Yep! Hadn’t even thought of that but it’s a real possibility..
I think no matter what kind of jobs they have or how much they earn or whether it is wfh or woh, 95% of women will remain responsible for 95% of domestic responsibilities. And until we come up with a form of feminism that acknowledges that truth (not by trying to change it but by honoring it), we will continue to be screwed.
I find the cognitive load research the most interesting part of this argument. DH and I split tasks pretty evenly--cooking, laundry, dishes, etc. But it is the remembering that we need to wash a soccer uniform, buy a birthday present, kind of stuff that falls completely on me. So even when things seem equal, they aren't.
OP. maybe I had the unarticulated feeling that if I WOH at least I will be outside of the home for a chunk of each day, thereby exempting me from home responsibilities. But you are right, whether WFH and WOH, I still have to do the same stuff. I just like having periods of my day where I can pretend that is not the case. RIght now I feel like a SAHM with a time consuming/stressful hobby.
@Anon My DH is better at that stuff than I am. It is possible...
Realistically, employers want their staff back in office. WFH is temporary. The bigger long term issue is having kids with virtual learning, or having to stay home for 2 weeks with every cough or fever. I’ve resigned and deep inside feel my career is likely over at 44 yo. sad but I have to put our 3 kids first. I know many moms who have already quit months ago.